Today, I did orientation for the IOP program I am going to be starting on Monday. It was a 3-hour session split into three 1-hour sessions. I learned so much not just about the program but about myself. Immediately following that orientation, I had an appointment with my private therapist. What I learned the most though, and this may sound cliche, is that I am not alone in how I am feeling. Did you know constantly thinking about something and fearing that if you stop thinking about it you won’t be prepared when it happens is a form on OCD? I know that now. And that makes me feel so hopeful…because if there is a term for it, that means others have dealt with it, and there is treatment for it.
During orientation, they asked if I have any comfort items. I pulled out my “baby doll” from the late 80s, early 90s, who got me through so much trauma. My mom found it a few years back and gave it to me. He is now my comfort item to get through this time period in my life.
My private therapist (we’ll call her B) suggested getting a part-time job. So, I will be looking into that. I do have to be picky when it comes to that because I need a certain pay in order for it to make the most sense. Honestly, as long as I can afford gas, groceries, train tickets, and Netflix, I should be okay. Especially because we are about to pay off one of our vehicles. In another year, the other will be paid off. That’s like $600+ per month extra. Our biggest bill will be mortgage after that (utilities are pretty crazy as well). I cannot wait to not have car payments.
So, I start IOP officially on Monday at 7pm. I will update as I can during that time. Let’s lose the stigma against mental health.
I can’t wait to be my best self.
